Rapid Habit

Overcoming procrastination using EFT

2009-09-24T19:08:00.009-04:00

Procrastination is probably the most common and nasty habit.
I'm guilty of it as well. This article was planned to be posted last year...Anyway, here it goes.

If you are a procrastinator, you'll notice that you only procrastinate certain tasks, you may be late for your tax return that was due four months ago, but you watched the movie that was just released last week. You procrastinate because of anxiety, fear, or perfectionism. The shortcut to cure it is first to identify the reason.

EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) is based on new discoveries regarding the subtle connection among your body's energies, your emotions, and your health. By simply tapping on certain points of your body, you will release the emotion that is associated with your illness or negative behavior, therefor curing your body or change your behavior. Make sense? I didn't think so, untill I tried for myself.

It was September, I was still sitting on my ever daunting task: filing my tax return. I know I was getting some money back so I was not in a rush but the procrastination was draining my energy. I decided to give EFT a try. After 3 rounds of tapping, I opened my drawer, took out the first deck of receives and started the paperwork. I finished the whole thing in 2 days.

Want to try it for yourself?
First, watch this video. It contains couple of rounds of tapping. You don't have to finish it, just follow the points till you're familiar with the tapping points and the order. Now you're ready to start.

Step 1, figure out the emotion related to the task you've been procrastination. Is it anxiety, boring, tiring, or being forced?
Step 2, Focus on the emotions and give it a rating from 1 to 10.
Step 3, Do a round of tapping following the video, or on your own if you remember the sequence. It will be more effective if you replace 'This feeling" with the feelings you identified in step 1. You may focus on one particular feeling in the same round, or go through different feelings at each tapping point.
Step 4, Rate your emotions again. If your rating has not been reduced to zero or any acceptable level that you can start your task, go back to step 3.

It may take a couple of rounds for you to fully release the emotions, but just follow the instructions and you'll get there eventually.
I'd love to hear how it worked for you.

Seven money habits for a wealthy future

2009-01-10T21:10:00.011-05:00

According to a research on the economic security of American's middle-class families, 76% percent of the families do not have enough net assets to meet 3/4 of basic expenses for 3 months. Although the data was as of 2006, the report revealed a trend of the situation getting worse over the years.

These days, the newspaper is flooded with news on economic downturn, job loss, bankruptcy... Are you ready for the future? Rate yourself with the household financial security scorecard. Here are some money habits to get you off the shaky ground.

1. Start saving automatically.
Start from 10% of your after-tax income. Setup an investment account with some of the low-cost and low-risk index funds. Schedule a monthly or bi-monthly deduction from your checking account to feed it. You'll be surprised how much you can save in a year.

2. Set a realistic budget and stick to it.
Find out how much you've been spending every month. Set a budget that's both feasible and comfortable, but a little lower than your average spending. If you spend more than necessary, deduct the excess from the budget of the next month. If you end up saving some, keep it aside as a rewards to pamper yourself. And enjoy it without guilt.

3. Always go shopping with a list (and your reusable shopping bag).
If an item is on your list, look for a bargain first. But don’t buy anything ONLY because it’s cheap. It's not your responsibility to cram your personal space with useless stuff in order to help the manufactures clear their inventory. Ask yourself if you'll buy it if it's not on sale. If the answer is no, walk away.

4. Examine your cash flow monthly.
Pay off your credit card balance every month. Figure out your bank fees and eliminate them by choosing a different plan or different bank. Look at the charges on cable, cell phone, internet, membership, are you paying more than you should?

5. Detail your net worth on paper and keep updating it every quarter.
Calculate your assets and liabilities. Follow up on your investments and make adjustments if necessary. Have a plan to increase your asset, not your possessions. There are plenty of books teaching you how to do that, which is why you should...

6. Educate yourself about finance every week.
I borrow books from the library to make sure I read them. You can also talk to a financial adviser, but don't buy anything yet. Talk to your friends and do you own research. Make sure you understand what you are getting into. At the end of the day. The broker gets his cut regardless if your investment is paying off.

7. Work on generating more income everyday
Once you are in control of your finance, it's time to start making more money. It's the best way to improve your financial situation. If you are an employee, a side business can provide you more income and numerous tax deduction benefits. If you are not, find out better ways to turn what you are doing into a self-running business.

Money comes to those who know how to take care of them. Take care of your money and it will take care of you.

photo by Ben Goldstein

How I quit the "always late" habit

2009-01-08T00:59:00.007-05:00

I had always been late since I can remember. Late for school, for work, for dates, for appointments, flights, you name anything that is time sensitive, I've abused it. And paid dearly for it. I missed my flight once that I had to pay $1000 to get on the next flight to catch my best friends wedding. I kept my brother in law waiting at the bus stop for one hour before I show up for the free movie tickets. Oh, those painful memories.

I'm comfortable taking about it now because I'm now punctuate on everything that has a time stamp on it. Being punctuate was on my list of new year resolutions every year, as I was never able to achieve this goal. This year, I did it ahead of time.

You may be wondering how long or how hard I worked to quit this lingering habit. Well, I became punctuate one day and never gone back. No, I didn't take any magic pill. It was just a different way of thinking: instead of focusing on NOT being LATE, I decided to be EARLY. As simple as that.

I realized that I tend to schedule my time based on the best scenario which doesn't existing in real life. I allocate my commute time based on this theory and if all stars are aligned, I do get to be on time once in a blue moon, arriving out of breath. I was trying to eliminate my waiting time by not being early, which resulted in other innocent people's waiting time and my countless apologies.

By allowing myself to be there early. I'm able to take other things into consideration, such as traffic, missing earring, and out of gas (I now fill up my gas tank whenever it's less than half full. ) Turned out it feels WAY much better waiting than being late know someone else is waiting. I carry a book around so there is no time wasted on my side either. Works perfectly well. I announced my new improvement to my family and friends and they will make sure I won't slip back.

According to law of attraction, the brain can't differentiate NOT LATE and LATE, so use a positive word will get you where you really want to be. Try it for yourself and enjoy being EARLY.

Image by Leo Reynolds

Pick your good habits for 2009

2009-01-06T23:53:00.006-05:00

2009 is here when we can still remember the 2000 computer panic.
A decade is almost over. What have you achieved?

How about adopting some good habits in 2009 as your take away.
Here are some ideas:

10 good money habits
Not so difficult to do. Most can be automated once setup.
The stocks recommended are all Singapore based, but the concept works.

Understanding the Time Management Secrets of Millionaires
Tips on time management. The millionaire word make it more/less convincing.

Best Bedroom Habits To Start In The New Year
I've never thought of that. Is there an edition for the bathroom as well?

Top 9 Good Habits For A Deep Recession
I don't agree to all of them, especially the buy smart part where it tells you how to make grocery shopping cheaper. I believe in buy less with good quality.

Healthy habits for the new year
Most of the habits are common sense. Make it your habit by quantifying it. For example: instead of "Add fruit to your breakfast and vegetables to lunch and dinner.", make a habit to "Include 2 servings of fruit daily between meals."

Here is my pick:

Know where my money is going - Monitor cash flow monthly to adjust for the next month. Money comes to those who take care of it.
No clutter - a big challenge for me. Inviting friends over regularly will definitely force myself to clean up.
Make the bed everyday - I blame frequent travel for my bad habit of not making up my bed. In the hotel, someone else will do it. Maybe I should leave myself a tip for doing it. :-)
Floss

What's on your list?

Image by: Mikhail Palinchak

2 steps to replace your limiting habits with success habits at the speed of thought

2009-01-06T01:47:00.004-05:00

We talked about how to "use your imagination" as a technique to establish a new habit.
If you deem yourself as not so imaginative, here is a simple way to trick your brain into believing that you have become what you want to be.

Read this tip from "pressrelease". Sorry I couldn't find any information on the author from the page.

I tried it myself. I felt less confident in step one. Maybe it's because deep in my mind, I don't really want to get up at 5:30 every morning. Let me know if it works for you.

green habits - be a green shopper

2008-08-21T23:17:00.008-04:00

"Habits are formed when the memory associates specific actions with specific places or moods," - Duke University researcher, Wendy Wood

If being green is about being aware of where our food, energy and products come from, how they were grown or made, where they will go and how they will be handled when their useful lives are over. However, replace your old habits with the new green habits will drive the conscious thinking to your subconcious level and make it easy to do.

In this post, let's focus on some shopping habits:

Use usable grocery bags. They are more durable and often look better than cheap plastic bags. The challenge is to remember carrying them with you. Keep them in your car. Mentally rehear taking the bags with you before entering the grocery store you frequent.
No more bottled water. It's expensive, and is not necessarily healthier than tap water. Use a stylish stainless steel water bottle. It's safe and free of questionable Bisphenol A, a chemical that leaches from many plastic bottles.
Buy products with less packaging;
Buy refill instead of products in plastic bottles, like shampoo, detergent.
Cut down on meat. If more land has to be put into agricultural production to produce meat than to produce plant products, we are left with less nature.
Buy products that are reusable, recycled, or recyclable.

Last but not least:

Buy less. How much stuff does anyone really need? Do you really need another dress, another toy, another bag? Yes, you can recycle them later, but keep in mind they will first become your storage problem before they eventually become garbage. So before you put anything in your shopping cart, think how long you'll keep it. Another rule is to buy a few really good/expensive items that last, instead of lots of cheap stuff just because they are on sale.

If you have other ideas that can be added to this list, please share with us. Appreciate your effort in protecting our beautiful planet.

Kick A Bad Habit In 2 Minutes

2008-08-15T22:10:00.003-04:00

Hey it's getting better and better.
After my last post on "Can I break a bad habit overnight?", I found this even faster trick: "How To Kick A Bad Habit In 2 Minutes".

The trick is NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming), a technique to program your thoughts. The instruction provided by Si Dawson is simple to follow. Basically, it associate your own negative thoughts with the habit that you are trying to break, by squeezing your thumb and forefinger together.

I learned it before from watching TV. I know, I know, it's a bad habit. But some TV programs are actually constructive if you know how to choose.

It was the right solution at the right time for me. I used this technique to get over not a habit, but an ex of a breakup. It totally worked for me. The way I did it was quite similar but with an extra step.

First, think of the person while squeezing the thumb and fore fingers together.
Then, think of only the bad qualities and things that I disliked about my ex. Magnify the emotion and until it's unbearable that I had to escape.
Next, release the fingers on the left hand, press the thumb and forefinger of your right hand. Now think of all the positive things I can be or do without my ex in my life, and feel good until I find myself smiling and feeling happy.

After that, whenever I find myself missing him, I simply put my thumb and forefinger together and I will get out of the thoughts right away. Then I feel good about where I am by touching the thumb and forefinger of my right hand.

For it to work with habits, replaced "my ex" with "the bad habit". And here it goes:

1. Squeezing the thumb and fore fingers of your left hand together, think of the habit you want to quit, picturing your self doing it;

2. Think of only the bad consequences, guilt, regret, past bad experiences as a result of this habit. Magnify the emotion and until it makes you uncomfortable, sad, or sick.

3. Let go of your fingers of your left hand.

4. Press the thumb and forefinger of your right hand. Visualize yourself living the good habit. Make the imagination real using all your senses, and feel fantastic about it.

Next time you catch yourself sliding back to the old habit. Call on your fingers to help.

PS. Let me know if this works for you.

Can I break a bad habit overnight?

2008-08-11T23:14:00.005-04:00

According to Lynn Harris, Yes.
How? Hypnotherapy.

She shared her story of quit nail-bitting after a two-hour hypnotherapy session.
I've been attending hypnosis groups to experience it myself. After a few sessions, I'm still on the fence. But since hypnosis works directly with the subconscious mind, it is very likely the shortest path to changing your habit.

Whether you go to a hypnotherapist or DIY at home following a tape. The soothing voice is only there to guide you. It's you yourself who is doing all the work. Remember "The Secret"? The key concept is Self-affirmation. Positive thinking in your sub-conscious mind is critical in shaping your your behavior.

In previous posts, we talked about using imagination to help forming the new habit. It's actually the same theory.

The first time it worked for me was in high school. I had this vault-phobia in gym classes. No matter how many times I practiced, the idea of jumping over it always make my legs quiver. The night before the exam. I lied in my bed and pictured myself jumping over it with the precision of the gold medal winner. The next day, my body simply surprised myself with a beautiful finish effortlessly. Now I do the self-talk before important presentations and it works every single time.

Will it work for you? You'll never know until you try it.

Emotions and habits

2008-08-03T13:51:00.006-04:00

Do you eat unhealthy food when you feel sad or depressed? Do you go shopping for hours when you feel lonely and troubled? Do you play games over night when you are stressed or bored?

These habits triggered by our emotions are often the most difficult for us to break because we are simply unaware of the true reason why we have them. Even when we do identify the emotional reason behind, your emotion will most likely take control when you're in the moment, all your attention is focused on feeling better and your habitual belief is that the distractive behavior makes you feel better.

Catch yourself doing it.
Keep a log of the things you regretted doing. Like the $300 dress you have never and will never wear. The hours spent on the meaningless activities like watching soap opera or playing games. Ignoring the problem will not make it go away. Face it before you can start work on it.

For each bad habit, find a healthier alternative.
Go exercise. Remember the light moments after your workout? You feel energized and young. Read a book, find a topic you enjoy or explore a wide range of subjects. Spend some time with your friends and family. All these are good habits that enrich you, mentally and physically.

Reduce the exposure to the old habits.
Keep away from the places and things related to the bad habits. Do not stop at the fast food restaurants and through away their fliers. Don't stock up soft drinks and cakes in your fridge. If you have to go shopping, go 30 minutes before the store closes. This limit your time spent and you'll be more focused in getting what you really need.

Keep the good habit for 30 days. Be a creator of your habit, not just a creature of it.

(photo by nickdamico)

use your imagination

2008-07-24T09:31:00.006-04:00

So You made a decision, you set a date, you picked a reward, you still find it hard to change...
Imagination can make it much easier.

When you are trying to replace the old habit with the new one, you are denying your good friend, subconscious, and using your conscious mind to overwrite it. According to Law of Conflict, whenever your conscious and subconscious are in conflict, your subconscious invariably wins. However, you can trick your subconscious to help you.

The best time to talk to your subconscious is every morning when wake up and every night before you go to sleep, when you are most relaxed. Your conscious mind is not fully functioning, so you can program your subconscious mind to believe you are what you want to be.

Start by telling yourself what you are the person who has kicked the bad habit and enjoying the benefit of the good habit. Don't use future tense, say it as if it's a reality. Not "I will quit smoking." But "I've quite smoking and I am breathing in the fresh air." Not "I'm will get up early tomorrow." but "I am an early riser." Not "I'm trying to be punctuate." but "I am always on time."

Then, picture yourself living in the created reality. Engage all your senses: see yourself running early morning wearing tight outfits that shows your toned body; hear the birds chirping, smell the cut grass and the fragrance of flowers in the morning breeze, taste the cool water you carried with you, feel your feet bouncing from the ground. Enjoy that moment and engrave it in your mind. (Do not think how comfortable the bed is.)

A few things happen while you are doing this: your thought causes a physical reaction. Then what you expect will become reality in your mind. If persisted long enough, you will see organic changes.

You may have heard this story: A man accidentally locked himself inside a refrigerated box car. He recorded what he went though on the side of the car. "I'm slowing freezing to death. These may be my last words." The next day the man was found dead there on the floor. His body showed all symptems of frozen to death. However, the refrigeration unit was out of order. The temperature in the car had never gone below 57 F and there was plenty of air. The man died of his own illusion.

Remember, your brain cannot tell the difference between mental rehearsal and reality. So your subconscious will carry out the day the same you imagined. Use this powerful method to make good habits part of your life. Let your live unfold according to how you think.

(Photo by Jaquelinevanek.com)

Side effects of creating a new habit

2008-07-22T10:29:00.006-04:00

There are side effects of creating new habits out of an old one, are you ready, you become more creative and innovative.

According to an article in the New York Times, research shows that "When we consciously develop new habits, we create parallel synaptic paths, and even entirely new brain cells, that can jump our trains of thought onto new, innovative tracks.".

Some old habits that you want to abandon have been following you for years. They won't willingly go away. So instead of trying to erase them from your subconscious mind, create new ones to overwrite them. There is a Chinese saying:"Attack poison with poison." In this case, "Attach habit with habit."

Same effect can be achieved when you are doing something new. Think of yourself like a rubber band. When you are relaxed, there is no power, and you are in your comfort zone. The more your stretch it, the more powerful it will snap back, you are in your stretched zone. When you pull it too hard, it's becoming painfully and eventually get out of shape or break, that's when you are stressed. The ideal place you want to be is when you are stretched a little, but not relaxed or stressed out.

As everything else, there are side effects of being creative and trying new things everyday, it slows down the aging process of your brain. Are you up to it?!

(photo by pricklypearbloom)

Rapid Habit

2008-06-18T12:11:00.021-04:00

Habit: an acquired behavior pattern regularly followed until it has become almost involuntary; addiction
(dictionary.com)

Good habits are hard to acquire but easy to live with. Bad habits are easy to acquire but hard to live with.
Think of it as a pair of shoes: you put them on in the morning, if they are comfortable, you can focus your day on many important things; otherwise, your discomfort gets worse by the hours, and you can't wait to end the day early, so you can go home and kick them off. Choose the right shoes before you continue your journey.

How did I acquire my habits?
A simple way to look at it is our desire for pleasure, and avoidance of pain. When we associate pleasure with certain behavior, we want to repeat it over and over, before we know it, it becomes a habit, a part of us.

How do I change?
1. Create an inventory of good and bad habits.
Look at your daily routines. What are the things you'd like to change? What are the problems that keep bugging you that can be fixed by a good habit? What habits are critical in achieving your goals, and what are preventing you from becoming successful? The list should also include the good habits that you have already established. So you can see how effortless it is to maintain a good habit and enjoy all the benefits they bring.

2. One habit at a time
You need focus to make it happen. Prioritize your list and pick one habit you want to work on. Certain habits can be grouped to form a routine. For example, go to bed before 10pm and get up at 6am, go to gym or meditate for 1 hour and eat a healthy breakfast. (Very ambitious. )

3. Give yourself a reward
Your reward should be proportional to the behavior you want to change. For example, if you want to get up early, a Rolex would be too much a prize for some of us . You can pick something you really enjoy doing once a week, or pick one item from your shopping list as your reward for accomplishing your goal. Don't ever reward bad behavior. Occasionally, a little punishment would be necessary. Here is one way of doing it: wear a rubber band on your wrist. Whenever you catch yourself repeating the old habit or having a negative thought, pull it back and let it go. (Ouch!)

How long does it take to form a good habit or break a bad one?
Usually you need 3-6 weeks to form a habit. During this time your brain will physically change its wiring to make the new habit part of your subconscious mind. It's like flying a plane. To leave the ground, you need lots of energy and determination. Once the plane climbs to a certain hight, it's on autopilot. And you get to your destination much faster than on foot. After a good habit is established, you can repeat it with ease and benefit from it for the rest of your life. Stick to it from 30 days and see your life transformed. What a bargain!

What if I go back to the old habit?
(Are you wearing the rubber band? Use it now. Done? Ok, here we go.)
When you are doing something different, there is a certain level of anxiety because of the unfamiliarity. However, it's dangerous to feel comfortable with a bad habit. People who are insensitive to pain can get badly injured without knowing it. For the same reason, your health, relationship, and success is at risk if you don't replace your bad habits with good ones. Keep in mind of the bigger picture. A little draw up is no excuse of giving up.

When shall I start?
The best time to start is yesterday, the second best time is NOW.

(Photos by cisley)